Pain
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Efforts
I have worked myself Down to the bone Lived my life Doing as I was told I tried to keep the standards To be a good Christian I wrote down every command From the things I listened I tried to fit Other people’s expectations Mould myself Into their fittings The effort Left me a wreck… Continue reading
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Pains and Passions
A lament Like the tide Is drawn back out to sea So my passion for writingTugs at me Like a wolf Howling at the moon So my passions threaten Me to consume My desires yearn within They pierce my insides With bitter sorrow They scream and cry But my body crumbles At the first step,… Continue reading
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Writer
A lament God, why have you made me To be a writer? To be inflicted With these desires? Pain builds up Within my soul Until it bursts out In these words of turmoil In my head Words scream aloud Worlds are being born Characters wander around My mind will not rest It will not stop… Continue reading
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Journal
Looking back In my journal I see the goodness of God In every scribble I see agonising questions And desperate prayers Answered by God A few pages later I see that God Has been speaking to me That there is a theme to His messages That before I could not see I see my current… Continue reading
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The Vase
They put the vaseIn my hands at birthAlong with a noteOf how much it was worth When I could walkI had to place it on my headThere it had to remainNo matter what I said Everyone’s eyesSeemed to be drawn to itWhispering and watchingTo see if it would slip So I worked harderThan all the othersPushed myself to… Continue reading
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Misery’s Pit
My last few poems have talked about the importance of expressing emotions. Here’s why I have learned that I cannot stay there. Some emotions are a trap. I have found that the pit that they dig has no bottom. So I am learning that after I have felt, I evaluate. Then I let go of… Continue reading
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Black Poison
I spit black poisonOut of my mouthA venomous riverWinding its way south It’s an overflowFrom my tortured heartInjected with miseryBy events so dark They are harsher thanI truly meanBut I can’t hold backWhen I paint this scene I must let the angerThe bitterness pour outSo I can truly comprehendWhat this pain is about Then I can learnForgive when I… Continue reading
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Thimble Sized Heart
I feel the rage inside meA rolling fury of seaAn eruption of fierce stormsAnger at what could have been There is a seething, contorting massResiding in my soulA hurricane of epic proportionsA viciousness I cannot control All that angerAll of that rageIs condensed into a thimbleA small, rattling cage This tiny contraptionIs thrust into my heartHissing like a… Continue reading
Anger, Bitterness, Christ, Christian Poetry, Depression, Emotions, God, Healing, Hope, Pain, Poetry, Redemption, Trauma, Trust -
Resentment
To the sadness in my heart, I see you, I hear you. I will discern what is true but first tell me your story. Resentment, I see youI suppressed my painI lied to myselfAgain and again Pretended I was alrightMade excuses for othersBuried the seeds of hurtDeep under the covers And now you writheIn the depths of… Continue reading
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I May Exaggerate
I see my poems on depression as a way of understanding me. When I bury my feelings in the dark, I find that I am condemned to wander round in circles without knowing why. I do not see them as declarations of truth. I know the bleakness in them is a distorted image. But understanding… Continue reading
Dawn & Dusk 